A Closet Slut by Sonali Mohapatra

Posted on 19 October, 2017 at 1:31 pm by womenbeing

Today, Womenbeing has the pleasure and the honor to share with you a poem from a friend. Somali is a physicist, a phd student, a writer, a singer, a poet. On her amazing talk during the International interdisciplinary Conference 2017 we had the opportunity to hear her read one of her poems and we just couldn’t miss the chance to share with you.

A Closet Slut

I am a slut

who goes around the world

trying to prove that

she is not.

When I am at home,

 I wear a vest

but when I open my room

 to someone’s knock

 I waste 5 minutes looking

for a sweater that

covers me up

and a minute

looking in the mirror

to see that the fact that

I am not wearing a bra,

 does not show.

I am a slut

in comfortable  nightclothes  all day long

 the gap between my breasts  showing

 and my navel exposed

and I cannot sleep

unless I am wearing

sleeveless  tops

that is a little too thin

and a short shorts,

which gives me enough  air

 and keeps me not too hot.

 But as soon as I wake up,

 I pull on a pair of slacks

and a long sleeved top

 Put on my bra

before I go use the communal spaces

for people might stare

if my you-know-whats show!!

And when I am getting ready for work

or to go out somewhere,

I make sure

 my necklines not too low

and my skirt won’t fly in the wind

my top is not translucent

my shorts are not too short,

 my top is not too thin

my earrings are not slutty

my eyeliner does not scream

prostitute

and my lipstick does not shout

“red light district”.

 My boots or heels must not look sexy enough

to “warrant” a rape

and my purse

must not be too glittery.

I also think about

how my shrieks  must not be too girly,

my smile not too suggestive

my laughter not too masculine

and my walk

not too feminine.

Everything I say should start with,

“Hey, I have a boyfriend”

not to draw you in,

If my legs are showing

they must not be

Oh so leggy-ly long!

 which could go round your chest.

So I wonder,

what am I?

 A closet slut?

 A female in denial?

A cacophony of wrongness?

Sonali Mohapatra

To read more from Sonali check out her blog.
Picture source: Nuria Pampín

MeToo Movement: women’s voices on sexual harassment

Equally Flawless: The Beauty of Diversity and equal representation of women in the Fashion, Media, and Creative Industry